Δευτέρα 7 Δεκεμβρίου 2009

Carbon Dioxide? Not in MY planet!

THE COP 15:

Today, Monday the 7th of December, the world climate conference begins in Copenhagen, with the ultimate aim of reaching a consensus amongst the participants for the decrease of emission levels of the so-called “greenhouse gases”, chiefly carbon dioxide. Most of scientific and public opinion has come to the conclusion there is such an accumulation of GHGs (especially CO2) in the atmosphere due to anthropogenic causes, that the climate is changing. The over-concentrations of these gases is producing global warming that affects long-term climate, with negative impacts on humanity in the foreseeable future. Globally implemented LCE's therefore, are proposed as a means to avoid catastrophic climate change, and as a precursor to the more advanced, zero-carbon society and renewable-energy economy.

AIMS AND GOALS OF OUR ORGANIZATION:

As an alternative to the COP15 goals, our organization, the “Prussian Ultimate Solution Hope FOR WARranted Decrease” or “P.U.S.H. FOR.WAR.D” suggests the following:

-A radical and immediate decrease of greenhouse gases, in a much more efficient, accurate and quick way.

-The seizure of mass hysteria symptoms and the psychological effects this may cause to the remaining skeptics, apathetic and those with a more composed approach to the problem.

-The word-to-mouth spread of the philosophical belief of “equalization”, which is the concept of human beings being absolutely equal to all other species, surviving or extinct and the realization that another mass extinction event affecting our species should be considered as natural as the Cretacious-Tertiary extinction event which brought about the loss of dinosaurs allowing mammals to flourish and become the dominant species of the planet with their spearhead being the apex predator known today as “human”.

RESEARCH HISTORY:

In order to address the problem efficiently, P.U.S.H. FOR.WAR.D has come up with Project Blausäure, the simultaneous emission of another gas, “rival” to that of carbon dioxide which in (brief) time will bring about the end of the destructive effect of all greenhouse gases.

Throughout our organizations course, various chemical formulas have been tested to this end, but the breakthrough discovery is only recent, when compared to the timelength of our research. The actual agent selected for the environmental breakthrough was discovered as early as 1704, alas without any knowledge of its chemical structure. This only happened in 1815 and was achieved by our late CEO Joseph Louis Gay-Lussac which identified the substance's structure to be HCN or HYDROGEN CYANIDE. Hamilton Castner, a prominent member of our organization, then came up with one of the best methods of mass-producing the agent in 1894 allowing for virtually endless supplies of HCN.

Joseph Louis Gay-Lussac

Although our organization had substantial knowledge concerning the structure and production of hydrogen cyanide, this was not the case when it came to the enormous potential the agent held. This was discovered half a century later, when in the early days of 1942, a whole new level of experimenting with HCN began, in our research facilities of Auschwitz-Birkenau and Majdanek.

Research facility in Auschwitz-Birkenau.

The motto on the gate is still one of our qualities.

The results of the experiments yielded impressive results in environmental control, biology (the agent is a possible predecessor of amino acids and thus the potential progenitor of chemical life) and astronomy (the gas has been discovered in the interstellar medium).

THE FINAL SOLUTION:

After centuries of research, it has become obvious to us that the most efficient solution lies with the aforementioned formula of HCN. The practical guidelines include the massive production of HCN and its consequent release in the atmosphere in concentrations between 300 mg per cubic meter and 3200mg per cubic meter. If global coordination is successful, the carbon dioxide problem will be resolved in less than a single day. Moreover, not only the human-generated emissions of greenhouse gasses will be addressed: all excessive activity of flora and fauna (i.e. breathing) will seize to be a problematic factor to the atmosphere.

Simple and efficient: our Project's mantra.

The release of massive quantities of hydrogen cyanide in the atmosphere will thus include all three goals set by Project Blausäure:

1) Putting a halt to CO2 emissions.

2) Controlling mass hysteria and global angst for the phenomenon.

3) Befriending with the concept of mass extinction.

Hydrogen Cyanide: it builds smiles.

YOUR PART IN THE SOLUTION:

For those who understand and embrace our goals and approach, there is always a way of contributing:

Donation means a great deal to facilitating our goals! It's not just money, it's anything! Have you been employed in any Amusement Center, Theme Park, Research Facility or Foreigners Exchange Camp in Germany during 1939-1945? Do you know how to pull a lever? Do you own a gas mask? Do you work as a farmer in the Czech Republic and use URAGAN-2 insecticide? If the answer to any of the above is yes, SIGN UP NOW!!! Work hours are low and pay is high! (Note that due to production costs of the project, all participants are due to be paid after the initiation ceremony held in the Dachau suburb, outside Munich).

If you do not meet any of those qualifications mentioned above, don't let that get you down! You can always become our sponsor by donating anything you feel like donating! PayPal address for funds transfer is Silence_Is_Sexy (at) prussianblue (dot) nz.

JOIN OUR CAUSE!

FOR A BETTER FUTURE.

A BETTER WORLD.

WE ARE THE SOLUTION.


1 σχόλιο:

  1. Θέλω απλά να πω ότι μόλις είδα τον τίτλο, σκέφτηκα γιατί να κάνεις ποστ για τρανς συγκρότημα.
    Μετα θυμήθηκα ότι λέγονται Nitrous Oxide και όχι Carbon Dioxide.Αυτό.

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